


I forgot that I had some to give

by sarahcakes613



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Bathing/Washing, Crymaxing, Hand Feeding, Hand Jobs, Light Dom/sub, M/M, Orgasm Delay/Denial
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-08
Updated: 2020-12-08
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:42:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27963986
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sarahcakes613/pseuds/sarahcakes613
Summary: Nick's usually the one in control, but he's had a really long and shitty day, so Mike takes the lead.
Relationships: Nick Amaro/Mike Dodds
Comments: 9
Kudos: 20
Collections: MIKE DODDS!!





	I forgot that I had some to give

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Perpetual Motion (perpetfic)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/perpetfic/gifts).



> I was absolutely going to wait to post this til tomorrow but also I have no impulse control. Happy early birthday, Gayle!

Nick doesn’t slam the door when he comes in, but it’s a near thing. He can still feel himself vibrating with a tension that over an hour in front of a heavy bag didn’t fix, and his jaw is aching from how tightly he’s been clenching in an effort not to grind his teeth into powder.

He’s like a spring, wound up in the tightest coil and ready to ricochet if something sets him off.

The foyer smells like warmth, like cinnamon and orange zest, and he follows his nose into the kitchen, where Mike is humming to himself as he shapes rolls on a baking sheet.

“Hey,” he comes up behind Mike and buries his nose in the other man’s neck. He smells like the dough he’s working and there is something so comforting about that homey smell that Nick feels a layer of tension slough off him.

Mike’s hum changes tone as he leans back into the embrace. “You were at the gym later than usual today.”

There’s no accusation in his voice, just an observation, but it still needles under Nick’s skin, and he steps back.

“Yeah, well. It was a rough day, needed to pound it out.”

His boyfriend turns around now, his eyes flicking over Nick’s body, no doubt picking up on the taut way he is holding himself together.

“Did it help?”

Nick shakes his head. “Not really.”

Mike nods and turns back to the bread. He slides the sheet into the oven and sets the timer.

“Come on,” he says, taking Nick’s hand and leading him out of the kitchen. Nick follows obediently but balks when Mike stops in front of the closet in their bedroom, where they keep their toys.

Nick loves when Mike gives over control. He loves the heady power that comes from being given that trust, and there are nights where he wants nothing more than to lay pink and red stripes across Mike’s back and ass until he begs to be allowed to come. But tonight is not that night. He’s still too angry, too caught up in the day, and he is barely in control of himself, he can’t be trusted to control someone else.

“No way,” he says, stepping back. Mike looks steadily at him. “I can’t, not tonight.”

Mike’s brow furrows and then smooths out, understanding. He puts his hand on Nick’s jaw, his thumb sweeping over the hinge where he knows Nick clenches the hardest. The caress is firm, almost a massage, forcing him to unlock his jaw.

“I would never ask you to take that on when you feel like this,” he says quietly. “Do you trust me?”

Nick nods, it’s the only answer he will ever have to that question.

Mike smiles, a small proud thing that makes his eyes shine. “Then let me take care of you. Let me take the reins tonight.”

He’s not sure how to respond. Powerplay is only one small part of their relationship but when it comes up it is always Nick in the dominant position. Mike submits so beautifully, and Nick is too stubborn, too contrary to let himself cede that kind of control.

Mike’s thumb never stops stroking and his fingers wind around Nick’s head to cup the back of his neck. They curl, tugging gently, and Nick slumps forward into the embrace.

“Let me take care of you, Nicky.”

It’s said softly, but it reads like an order, and Nick is surprised to feel another layer of the day’s frustration fall away, his shoulders relaxing just the slightest bit.

“Yes,” he says. “Please.”

Mike leans down and kisses him. His lips are dry and soft and Nick’s open under the pressure. He moans low in his throat as Mike’s tongue sweeps in and then out so fast it’s like it wasn’t there. He tilts forward as Mike pulls away.

He reaches for something on one of the shelves in the closet and then takes Nick’s hand, leading him into the ensuite. He guides Nick to sit down as he kneels in front of the tub and starts running the water, testing the temperature on his wrist. Once it feels right, he puts in the stopper and slowly pours a tiny amount of bath oil in as the tub fills, using his hand to disperse it through the water.

Nick is still in his sweaty gym clothes, and Mike turns and nudges him to stand again. He starts at Nick’s feet, lifting each foot to peel off his socks and toss them in the hamper. His shorts are next, and his briefs, and then he raises his arms to let Mike pull off his shirt.

Mike pauses to kiss the scar on Nick’s rib cage. So far, this all feels very similar to the type of service submission they sometimes engage in, but when they do that Mike is always naked first. That one simple change of Mike being fully dressed is enough to set the entire scene on its side.

Already, Nick feels less like he needs to hold himself together. Mike is there to hold things for him.

“Get in,” he says, and Nick climbs into the full bath. The water is hot and his skin tightens and tingles from the shock of it. He goes to lean back but Mike’s hand stops him. He brings forward the item he’d pulled from the closet, a small bolster and wedge pillow designed to be affixed to any hard surface.

He presses it against the back of the tub and then encourages Nick to lie back. It shapes perfectly to his neck and shoulders and one more layer of tension dissolves into the hot water surrounding his relaxed body.

“I’ll be right back,” Mike says. “Just let yourself float.”

It’s easier said than done. Even with the layers that are stripped away Nick is still buzzing with tension, and the minute Mike leaves the room he feels the strings pulling tighter as he tries to hold himself together again.

The longer he is alone the louder the buzzing, until he is vibrating again, the water rippling around him as his muscles tremble.

“Hey, hey,” Mike is back, his voice soothing as he sets a plate down on the closed toilet seat. He plunges a hand into the water, gripping Nick’s leg, just firm enough to be grounding.

“Sorry,” Mike whispers into his hair, kissing him on the temple. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have left you alone.”

“I’m fine,” Nick grouses, but his voice is shaky and full of gravel, and he leans into Mike’s embrace, wanting to feel his warmth against the parts of him not soaking in the heat of the bath.

Mike reaches back for the plate, balancing it on his lap as he sits next to the tub. Nick looks down and sees thick slices of fresh-baked bread covered in a layer of honey butter. Almost on cue his stomach grumbles, reminding him that his last meal was a hastily grabbed protein bar on his way out of work some hours ago.

Mike tears the bread into bite-size pieces and holds one up to Nick’s lips.

“Open,” he says, and Nick’s lips part, allowing him to place the bread on his tongue.

It is still warm from the oven, the spread sweet and sticky and it softens the bread so it seems to almost melt in his mouth. He chews, swallows, parts his lips for another piece. As Mike feeds him, he finally, blissfully, feels himself sinking properly into a place where the frustrations of the day cannot touch him.

He hears Mike humming again, hears the low murmur of Mike saying something, but it washes over him as he chews, swallows, parts his lips. When the bread is finished, Mike feeds him the last drops of honey butter, wiping them off the plate with the pad of his finger and putting it to Nick’s lips.

His tongue swipes out to lick at the finger, then does a sweep of his lips to make sure he didn’t miss any.

“Good,” Mike says, his voice throaty, and Nick basks in the single word of praise.

Mike reaches for soap and a wash cloth, and scoots to the other end of the tub. He again begins at Nick’s feet, soaping him up, following with a rub of the cloth, and then ending with a rinse from the tap. He moves up Nick’s body, soap and rub and rinse, washing away the day’s sweat and leaving him fresh and clean.

He washes Nick’s cock and balls as perfunctorily as the rest of him, despite the way Nick spreads his legs and tilts his hips invitingly, moving away to continue up his torso, around to scrub at his back and shoulders.

“Hair?” Mike asks, and he nods, the movement sluggish. He leans forward again and closes his eyes as Mike pours handfuls of water over his hair to wet it. He uses his own pine-scented shampoo as opposed to Nick’s coconut one, and Nick thrills at it, feels it pushing at the same part of him that basks in praise. He likes that Mike wants him to smell like him, wants to claim him through all his senses.

Mike’s fingers dig into his scalp, massaging and scratching lightly, fingering out the tangles. Every small tug at a knot sends a spark through his core and his head falls forward as he groans quietly.

“Almost done, baby,” Mike says, and turns the tap on again to rinse out the shampoo. He’ll brush in some leave-in conditioner when they are done but for now he just finger-combs Nick’s hair back off of his face.

As Nick leans back again, his cock peeks out of the water, rising hard and pink between his legs.

“Do you want me to ignore it or pay attention to it?” Mike asks, his hand dangling just above, fingers grazing Nick’s thigh.

“Attention,” Nick’s voice is soft. “Please.”

He squeezes some lotion onto his hand and wraps his fingers around Nick’s cock. He doesn’t tease or play, and Nick gasps as he begins moving his fist up and down in a loose, slow but steady motion.

“Do you want to come?” He asks, and Nick struggles to answer. He’s never given up this much control before, never sunk this far down into the space in his mind, but it feels so good and he wants to stay down there.

He shakes his head.

“No?” Mike sounds surprised, but doesn’t stop moving his hand, the slick and callus of his fingers and the lotion creating a friction that Nick wants to arch into as much as he wants to escape from.

He whimpers as he feels the tell-tale pressure building at the base of his spine, and his hand shoots out to grip Mike’s forearm. His grip on Nick’s cock tightens and holds, not moving, until the impending orgasm eases back and he lets go of Mike’s arm.

“Good,” Mike says again. “You’re so good, Nicky.”

Mike is the only person he lets call him that now, the only person with the privilege of that intimate childhood diminutive. He’s the only person who never manages to make it sound condescending. Even now, his voice is full of nothing but pride and love.

Nick’s entire world is the unravelling knot in his belly as Mike edges him, brings him close and then eases him back twice more before removing his hand entirely from Nick’s cock.

“Do you want to come?” He asks again, and this time Nick nods. He can feel tears at the edge of his vision, he is so hard it hurts, and he’s never felt this kind of need so exquisitely before.

Mike’s hand skims along his cock and trails down the crease of his thigh and his hips jerk, his cock twitching against his stomach. Mike seems to be waiting for something.

“Mike,” Nick’s voice cracks as the tears begin to slide down his face. “Mikey, please.”

Mike’s hand grips his cock tightly and strips it hard and fast until every string in Nick’s body is cut at once as he comes, his cock jerking and spraying, thick and white spattering onto his stomach. He lets out a sob of relief, the cries becoming a hiccough as his body comes down and his mind comes up.

As his brain comes back online he realizes Mike has been talking to him.

“You’re so good, baby,” he is repeating. “I’m so proud of you, you’re so good for me. I love you so much.”

“I love you too,” Nick mumbles, spent and exhausted.

As he lets Mike rinse him off and then lead him into a pair of soft worn pyjamas and into bed, he is still floating just below the surface, still soaking in the praise and elation of the scene. He slides from that peaceful headspace right into sleep, into the deepest sleep he can remember having in years.

Later, Mike’s voice will again be filled with pride as he tells Nick how beautiful his submission was, how honoured Mike was to witness it and receive it.

His voice will be gentle as he suggests that perhaps they open up the possibilities in that section of their relationship, because sometimes Nick needs someone else to keep him from flying apart, or sometimes he needs someone to make him fly apart and then put him back together, and Mike can be that person the way Nick is that person for Mike.

Saying yes will be the easiest decision Nick has ever made.

**Author's Note:**

> I am so glad I've finally gotten to use the crymaxing tag. Petition to make it a canon tag, please and thank you.  
> Also, this ticks the "in charge" box on the MIKE DODDS!! bingo card!


End file.
